Saturday, July 4, 2009H1N1
- I am, quite honestly, getting a wee bit freaked out about this pandemic. Not that I would contract it (what are antivirals for?) but that I would mistakenly thought of as a "suspected" victim.
- This is because I'm feeling sickly right now. Loaded up on my vits, took a couple of panadol to relieve the mock-fever and just resting right now. Hopefully it'll go away before I go back
- Can't live with them, can't live without them!
- No, that was just a joke! :P
- My friends are the awesome-est bunch of people I know!
- And this includes the friends from high school, friends here and just plain everywhere!
- Its way too early to be thinking of my wedding but I definitely know who will be my 7 dayangs aka bridesmaids on my wedding day. :p (Teshie, Nadia, Hazleana, Soo Ching, Zakiah, Xiang Yun and Shari)
- But of course, I can't stand certain people. Not friends. No way, we're not close enough for that. I'd say they were close acquaintances. Honestly, what's with the buy & tell that's going around these days? 4 letters. 1 word. R-I-A-K. You figure it out
- It's getting unbearable! Boredom has sunk in after the end of my obstetrics practicals yesterday.
- Altogether I saw about 10++ births and performed 1 vaginal examination.
- Verdict : Giving birth is no easy thing! Its painful and makes me wince everytime I think about it. But in the end, I honestly believe that its 100% worth it. :)
- Home is waiting for me. Just one more week to go!
- Don't have immediate plans but my rough sketches of what I'll be up to are as follows.
- Play with my hair. I'm not sure if i'll be straightening it, perming it or just chopping it all off but I'll definitely change it up a bit. Just a bit. I love my hair the way it is, really.
- Shopping. Unlike the buy & tellers, I'm quite happy with my High Street fashion. Goodbye Mega, Real, Pakrovskaya. Hello Forever 21, Isetan, Top Shop, GAP.
- Family. I miss my parents and my sister soooo much! This might due to change in the first 5 minutes in the car (My family is annoyingly critical) but for now, they are the people in the world I want to see the most! Of course, I want to see my ridiculously cute niece, Sophia Meiyin Rizal.
- Cats. Yes, that means my little momo-bear aka monster bear.
- Fasting. I <3 Ramadhan in Malaysia. Been fasting and celebrating Hari Raya in Russia for 4 years now.
- Friends. Meeting old friends and semi-new ones. :) Jom lepak kat OldTown!~~
- Gadgets. My dad's got me a new phone, I hope it's not a bad one. :) I've grown out of the whole 'gadgets are the window to your pocket' phase so I'll be happy if I can text, email, and browse the internet on it. Also, I'm craving for a new laptop! :) Was supposed to get it last winter but certain things got in the way.
- I think that's it! Can't wait to touch malaysian soil on 13th July 12.20pm.
10:06 PM |
Tuesday, June 30, 2009If Gossip Girl had a Lonely Boy, I must be the other half - Lonely Girl
Strange that the bouts of loneliness strikes you at the most odd time. I just came back with my roommate from celebrating my boyfriend's 22nd birthday at Biblioteka (this really cool cafe down by Main Street) and I was really really happy until I wasn't.
You know, you always see yourself a certain way (well, at least I do) like what you think other people see you as? And for me, I see that my family sees me as this uptight, boring person. And that makes me be one even more. At least when I'm around them. I don't really get it. I don't get me.
If I was gone, would it matter?
If I were to get hit by a bus today, who would mourn me tomorrow?
My thoughts sound suicidal don't they? I don't mean them to. I'm just upset. :s Does anyone miss me when I'm gone? Will anyone?
Strange that the bouts of loneliness strikes you at the most odd time. I just came back with my roommate from celebrating my boyfriend's 22nd birthday at Biblioteka (this really cool cafe down by Main Street) and I was really really happy until I wasn't.
You know, you always see yourself a certain way (well, at least I do) like what you think other people see you as? And for me, I see that my family sees me as this uptight, boring person. And that makes me be one even more. At least when I'm around them. I don't really get it. I don't get me.
If I was gone, would it matter?
If I were to get hit by a bus today, who would mourn me tomorrow?
My thoughts sound suicidal don't they? I don't mean them to. I'm just upset. :s Does anyone miss me when I'm gone? Will anyone?
Labels: emo
9:30 AM |
Friday, June 26, 2009
two Hippos sitting on a notepad, K-I-S-S-I-N-G!
Got these from Claire's while out shopping with bf and roomie. :)
I <3 Hippos!
1:50 AM |
Monday, June 22, 2009Today was my very first day on the wards for this year. Most medical universities around the world incorporate clinical training with theoretical material during the school term eliminating the need for summer practicals or "elective" as they call it in Malaysia. I wish this was the case for Russian medical schools every single day.
I've been on the wards before. A month at the end of my 2nd year, another month at the end of my 3rd and now 1.5 months at the end of my 4th. The first two years of my summer electives were spent in Hospital Melaka, a mere 5-10 minutes drive from my 2nd home in Melaka. It was a scary thing, being there. Sometimes I feel more at home at Больница им. Семашко compared to Hospital Melaka.
I tell myself every day that I need to be more proactive in my medical education. I read books, I memorize texts, I know the algorithms but when it comes to patients - I fail. And what good is a doctor without his patient?
How can I possibly improve when here in Nizhny Novgorod, I'm alienated because of the colour of my skin, because of my weird Russian slang and the slight incapability to speak it and most of all, because of I'm Innostranni. Things don't get much better in Malaysia either. There, I'm like the invisible lamp post. :p
Its all fine for certain people here. They've got the connections to do their summer practicals in hospitals like IJN, etc. And most importantly, they've got the connections to make sure that someone actually supervises them. Me? I'm just a loose cannon in the hospital.
I'm really tired so this post will be continued when I have the time (and the credit).
I've been on the wards before. A month at the end of my 2nd year, another month at the end of my 3rd and now 1.5 months at the end of my 4th. The first two years of my summer electives were spent in Hospital Melaka, a mere 5-10 minutes drive from my 2nd home in Melaka. It was a scary thing, being there. Sometimes I feel more at home at Больница им. Семашко compared to Hospital Melaka.
I tell myself every day that I need to be more proactive in my medical education. I read books, I memorize texts, I know the algorithms but when it comes to patients - I fail. And what good is a doctor without his patient?
How can I possibly improve when here in Nizhny Novgorod, I'm alienated because of the colour of my skin, because of my weird Russian slang and the slight incapability to speak it and most of all, because of I'm Innostranni. Things don't get much better in Malaysia either. There, I'm like the invisible lamp post. :p
Its all fine for certain people here. They've got the connections to do their summer practicals in hospitals like IJN, etc. And most importantly, they've got the connections to make sure that someone actually supervises them. Me? I'm just a loose cannon in the hospital.
I'm really tired so this post will be continued when I have the time (and the credit).
Labels: medical school stuff, russia
11:58 AM |
Saturday, June 20, 2009Congratulations are in order...to ME!
I'm officially a 5th year student. I passed all my 4th year exams with colours that are only available in Heaven. Alhamdulillah. :)
I studied without expectations cuz everyone knows, here in Russia you get what you get and the lecturer's are always in PMS mode and sometimes people who copy (those darn cats!) get a perfect score because...well, they copied and they "know" everything. and those of us who studied have to settle with a B.
Thanks to Dr Karan's mantra, I was able to cope with Neurology and Internal Medicine. :) I hope he's doing well in Malaysia now. Wonder when is his operation and my prayers go out to him! :) He said that we should just study and just keep studying and enjoy it. No stress. Don't Think of the exam. Just finish studying in your own pace, without stress/tension. I know, maybe it sounds easier said than done but hey, I studied Neuro and Internal w/o stress wor...haha. ok, maybe IM got stress a bit lar, esp the treatment part but overall, I enjoyed the studying part. Really! So much so that even tho my exam is over, I have OBS practicals starting monday so I'm gonna go and repeat my OBS notes again. :)
But not now. Because its 4am and I haven't had much sleep for the whole month. Goodnight everyone.
And to that anon, here's a special msg : I know who I am, I know the stigma of the Russian medical graduate that I will have to come back to when I practice in Malaysia. You're probably the umpteenth person to tell me that I suck :) But its ok. Just please don't do it too often. It's really bringing down the cute layout I have here. Ha.
Great, now you're gonna go think I'm shallow pulak....cis! Takpe, I admit this much : I love the colour pink and cute stuff.
I'm officially a 5th year student. I passed all my 4th year exams with colours that are only available in Heaven. Alhamdulillah. :)
I studied without expectations cuz everyone knows, here in Russia you get what you get and the lecturer's are always in PMS mode and sometimes people who copy (those darn cats!) get a perfect score because...well, they copied and they "know" everything. and those of us who studied have to settle with a B.
Thanks to Dr Karan's mantra, I was able to cope with Neurology and Internal Medicine. :) I hope he's doing well in Malaysia now. Wonder when is his operation and my prayers go out to him! :) He said that we should just study and just keep studying and enjoy it. No stress. Don't Think of the exam. Just finish studying in your own pace, without stress/tension. I know, maybe it sounds easier said than done but hey, I studied Neuro and Internal w/o stress wor...haha. ok, maybe IM got stress a bit lar, esp the treatment part but overall, I enjoyed the studying part. Really! So much so that even tho my exam is over, I have OBS practicals starting monday so I'm gonna go and repeat my OBS notes again. :)
But not now. Because its 4am and I haven't had much sleep for the whole month. Goodnight everyone.
And to that anon, here's a special msg : I know who I am, I know the stigma of the Russian medical graduate that I will have to come back to when I practice in Malaysia. You're probably the umpteenth person to tell me that I suck :) But its ok. Just please don't do it too often. It's really bringing down the cute layout I have here. Ha.
Great, now you're gonna go think I'm shallow pulak....cis! Takpe, I admit this much : I love the colour pink and cute stuff.
3:53 AM |
Friday, June 19, 2009After the awesomeness that was Neurology exam, I sat down to study for Internal Medicine. *GULP*
To tell you the truth, I was feeling scared about this exam for months already! Why? I shall give you a few reasons :
1. Elena Andreevna
2. Elena Andreevna
3. Elena Andreevna
One person is all the reason I was too freakin' scared to sit for the exam. :p Of course, Dr. Panova makes my BP go up too (geez, I'm getting chills just thinking of their names! wtf?) especially with the amount of people she failed last year. :s
The whole day yesterday and the morning of the exam (i didn't sleep for like 2 days minus 2 hours a day) I was revising, reviewing and just trying to read whatever I felt like I forgot. Drug doses were slipping from my head. Is this IV or PO? is this mcg or mg? You know, the usual. Its a bottomless pit, really, for me.
Maybe its because I had a really hectic last few rotations so I wasn't able to review the Internal info earlier but anyway, i don't really care why, it was just freaking HARD ok. Thk god for Davidson's because I didn't like the way Kumar & Clark wrote their information and reading Harrison's just takes too long (its the font. and the stupid sentences that has to be endless.)
So back to the story. Ahem. I was totally totally freaked right, but I went anyway because well, I don't want to be a ketam, if you will pardon the inside joke. Anyway, who willingly fails their exam on account of a no-show kn? :p
Reached 5th Hospital at 8.15am thinking that we were the firsts to reach...mana tau, Galex, Ivon, Xiangbin - they were all there already! Ceh, so bersemangat...! :) I went to the waiting area to freak out more and then I went in the hall. Was given a patient on the 9th floor. Ward 923.
Fucking Hell! That's Andreevna's floor. Please don't be here, please don't be here. Please dear God, I hope its not her patient! please don't be Andreevna's patient!!!!
SO many of us got patients on the 9th floor though, so I cooled down some. Went up, patient wasn't there. Was told to wait for my patient. Waited for my patient to come back from physiotherapy. Interviewed her, examined her, wrote my short case and then the examiner came. Dr. Petrov. :p He was kind of cute, for me lah. Neville said he looks funny but I thought he was kinda cute and selekeh. Haha. My patient went out again for physiotherapy so I couldn't finish my history taking. When she came back, he asked me to perform a general exam of her legs...afterwards, he asked me for my 2ndary dx...since her legs were cold, there was a very weak pulsation of the ant tibial, I just made the conclusion that she has PAD then hv to do X-ray with contrast to find the occlusion. He say, ok. PASS!
2nd part was the scary one - theory! :s so nervous i almost bailed out on it! But Andreevna wasn't there so I went for it. Got my bilet and sat down...then jeng jeng jeng..she came! So I started hyperventilating and freaking out more. So much that when it was my turn to answer, I had only done 1 question out of the 3 essays. So Neville went ahead of me to Tatiana and then I went next to Natalya Gennady. It was nerve wracking as well because before that, someone got screwed from her too. But whatever, I know what I know and I know what I don't so I went anyway. I told her everything I know about Pneumonia, Radon baths and Thyroid Crisis. She asked me some stuff I forgot to write. I answered her (albeit a bit slowly, since I had to gather my thoughts esp to answer her with the correct doses for 1st-line & 2nd-line Rx of CA pneumonia & HA pneumonia). Then, a miracle happened...i passed my exam! :)))
To tell you the truth, I was feeling scared about this exam for months already! Why? I shall give you a few reasons :
1. Elena Andreevna
2. Elena Andreevna
3. Elena Andreevna
One person is all the reason I was too freakin' scared to sit for the exam. :p Of course, Dr. Panova makes my BP go up too (geez, I'm getting chills just thinking of their names! wtf?) especially with the amount of people she failed last year. :s
The whole day yesterday and the morning of the exam (i didn't sleep for like 2 days minus 2 hours a day) I was revising, reviewing and just trying to read whatever I felt like I forgot. Drug doses were slipping from my head. Is this IV or PO? is this mcg or mg? You know, the usual. Its a bottomless pit, really, for me.
Maybe its because I had a really hectic last few rotations so I wasn't able to review the Internal info earlier but anyway, i don't really care why, it was just freaking HARD ok. Thk god for Davidson's because I didn't like the way Kumar & Clark wrote their information and reading Harrison's just takes too long (its the font. and the stupid sentences that has to be endless.)
So back to the story. Ahem. I was totally totally freaked right, but I went anyway because well, I don't want to be a ketam, if you will pardon the inside joke. Anyway, who willingly fails their exam on account of a no-show kn? :p
Reached 5th Hospital at 8.15am thinking that we were the firsts to reach...mana tau, Galex, Ivon, Xiangbin - they were all there already! Ceh, so bersemangat...! :) I went to the waiting area to freak out more and then I went in the hall. Was given a patient on the 9th floor. Ward 923.
Fucking Hell! That's Andreevna's floor. Please don't be here, please don't be here. Please dear God, I hope its not her patient! please don't be Andreevna's patient!!!!
SO many of us got patients on the 9th floor though, so I cooled down some. Went up, patient wasn't there. Was told to wait for my patient. Waited for my patient to come back from physiotherapy. Interviewed her, examined her, wrote my short case and then the examiner came. Dr. Petrov. :p He was kind of cute, for me lah. Neville said he looks funny but I thought he was kinda cute and selekeh. Haha. My patient went out again for physiotherapy so I couldn't finish my history taking. When she came back, he asked me to perform a general exam of her legs...afterwards, he asked me for my 2ndary dx...since her legs were cold, there was a very weak pulsation of the ant tibial, I just made the conclusion that she has PAD then hv to do X-ray with contrast to find the occlusion. He say, ok. PASS!
2nd part was the scary one - theory! :s so nervous i almost bailed out on it! But Andreevna wasn't there so I went for it. Got my bilet and sat down...then jeng jeng jeng..she came! So I started hyperventilating and freaking out more. So much that when it was my turn to answer, I had only done 1 question out of the 3 essays. So Neville went ahead of me to Tatiana and then I went next to Natalya Gennady. It was nerve wracking as well because before that, someone got screwed from her too. But whatever, I know what I know and I know what I don't so I went anyway. I told her everything I know about Pneumonia, Radon baths and Thyroid Crisis. She asked me some stuff I forgot to write. I answered her (albeit a bit slowly, since I had to gather my thoughts esp to answer her with the correct doses for 1st-line & 2nd-line Rx of CA pneumonia & HA pneumonia). Then, a miracle happened...i passed my exam! :)))
Labels: 4th year, exam, internal medicine
3:00 PM |
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Kimono-dress! Thanks to Nadia, a few clicks lead to a few thousand more clicks and I discovered the world of blog-shopping! I never knew it existed *gasp*Gosh, why bother hitting the stores anymore?? I <3 this dress. I think I'm going to go buy it. Like now. Haha.
12:19 AM |
